Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
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