i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
Randomize
