for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
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