Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
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