Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
Taco trucks are like ice cream trucks for drunk adults. They should have a mariachi tune they play super loud to bring people out of the bars for tacos.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
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