Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
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