I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
The convent might be a nice break from real life
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
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