woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
Randomize