Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
This beer is not sobering me up at all
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
Randomize
