Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
The maid moved your bed and found almost 40 used condoms and wrappers. She just looks at me and says "Dave?"
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize
