Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
