I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
Randomize
