Whoa Z and x make the same sound
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Randomize
