awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
Did you like my voicemail? Sounded like I was being murdered, right?
By a pack of ravenous dildos
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
Randomize
