Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
And my parents said I crawled through the house
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
