"it" just moved
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
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