um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
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