You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
Randomize
