i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
He told me they were just razor bumps!
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize
