I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
Randomize
