Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
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