around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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