She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
Randomize
