i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Randomize
