I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize
