My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
Randomize
