When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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