just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Randomize
