My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
23 Bisexuals Confess The Biggest Differences Between Dating People Of Each Sex
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
These 25 Ruthless Teachers Embarrassed Their Students
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?