Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
I answered the door to some Jehovah Witnesses hungover and wearing nothing but a white tshirt. I think they made it the church goal to reform me, we've gotten four pamphlets. My mom's going to make me convert if they keep coming.
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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