We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
Hippo gnu deer
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
Randomize
