Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
Randomize
