you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
Randomize
