I heard we made out
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
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