ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
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