I want to stick my p in your. b.
Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
My dream in life is to scissor with Ellen. I don't care if I've got a dick. I'll make it work.
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
Randomize
