I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
Randomize