I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Randomize
