Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
He wouldn't let me put a red handprint on his face or scream to him everytime he walked away.
Why did you want to do any of that?
If someones last name is Wilson, you are obligated to pretend that you are Tom Hanks and they are a Volleyball and quote the movie when you speak to them.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Randomize
