So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
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How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
I just woke up to my family in the living room watching our security camera tape of me last night talking to a stop sign in our backyard... How the fuck did I get that in the yard?
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