i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
