just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
the cashier wished me a happy fathers day while i bought condoms
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
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