Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize
