You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
Randomize
