Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
I got drunken sympathy for the whales' plight last night and signed up to give $50 monthly to Greenpeace. Calling to cancel was worse than the hangover.
Hear that? That's the wail of a dying whale. Murderer.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
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