it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
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