I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
That was an excessively violent trivia night
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize
