I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
Randomize
