My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize
