So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
Randomize
