I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
Randomize
